If there’s one thing I’ve observed repeatedly as a mentor and just an average person walking around living this life, it’s that people rarely seem to be asked, ‘What do you want?’ or they rarely ask themselves this question. And if they do, they give little credence to the answer they receive from within themselves.

So much of what we’re geared to do and be is about pleasing others: our families, our friends, our bosses, our teachers, our lovers, and the list goes on. Yet surely the question, ‘What do I want?’ should be the most important thing you ask yourself, and ask it regularly.

But I’m not talking about, ‘Do I want pizza or steak for dinner?’ The question I’m talking about is, ‘What does my soul want?’ or even more specifically, ‘What does my heart desire, for me?’

When I ask this question of clients and friends too often the response, ‘I want to do X but…’ and they follow the ‘but’ with a myriad of reasons why they can’t do or have what they want. These range from, ‘It’s too expensive’ and ‘XX would disapprove’ to ‘I could never make money out of it’ or ‘I couldn’t make it work’. Or it’s some kind of other self-restriction we’ve created for ourselves that may appear real but is not real all.

And when I hear these responses, underneath there is the call of a larger truth desperately seeking a way out. It is the heart of that person trying to be heard above self-doubt and pleasing every single other person in your life except for you.

Now we all have responsibilities and yes, we have bills to pay. But please allow yourself the opportunity to ask what you really want and then listen to the answer. I can’t tell you how passionately I feel about this issue and when I see people getting up and doing the same thing repeatedly, that they don’t want to do (professionally or personally) I just think, ‘What is the point of that?’

Everyone single person reading this blog is here to live their purpose and I don’t care what that purpose is because it’s not mine, it’s yours. And if you don’t ask yourself the question, ‘What do I want?’ and listen carefully to the answer, you are missing out on one of your greatest gifts…the capacity in you to create whatever it is that you are here to create.

If listening is the second step, then the third one is taking some kind of action however small, to help move you in the direction you truly desire to go. That might be simply getting up 15 minutes earlier to develop that online course you know people out there need, before you go to work. It might be making sure you take a notebook with you on the train every morning so you can capture those beautiful thoughts about that book that is bursting from within you. Or it might simply be seeking the advice of someone to help you work out how to move forward from that terribly stuck place you find yourself. Perhaps it is as simple as asking for help. Whatever action you take will help you get there. It will help you move closer to what you want. It will help you reach the thing your heart desires.

Of course, there are always going to obstacles – who told you that the act of creating something amazing is easy? It’s not. There are peaks and troughs, lightning and raging seas along the way. But if you remember, ‘This is what I truly want’ and you just keep going you will be amazed at where you end up. It might even be a place you never expected that is so much more wonderful than you ever imagined.

So please, for every single one of you reading this post ask yourself ‘What is it that my heart truly desires?’ Then listen to the answer and take just a single step today towards your goal. You have a purpose and your heart needs you to heed its call. It’s what you were born to do.