I was thinking today about how quickly life slips through our fingers. One moment we’re in school then suddenly we’re out in the world, studying, getting our first job and doing all the ‘adult things’ we were longing for.
But, often there comes a moment when we realise the adult life we were told to work for, isn’t quite what we want. And that throws everything up in the air because we don’t know what to do next.
There is a great line in the song, Once in a Lifetime by Talking Heads, where the singer asks “How did I get here?” The song tells of looking at your life and knowing it looks great on the surface but it has no meaning.
Without meaning in our life, why live it?
For me, meaning comes from doing what I know I’m here to do. Part of that involves constantly unthreading the blocks and beliefs that hold me back so I can step more fully into my purpose.
Even if you don’t know what your purpose is yet, look for the things that feel meaningful for you, then do more of that. It doesn’t have to look sexy to someone else. It doesn’t need to make world headlines or meet the approval of a single other person. It only needs to have meaning for you.
If you’re doubting your direction, go back and pick up those things that have meaning for you. In doing so, you will reconnect to what your Soul is longing for. And that is far more valuable than any prescribed ‘adult’ path.
I have a fear that gnaws away at me sometimes. It’s the fear that once everything opens up again, nothing will really have changed. Or more specifically, people will choose to go back to the way things were and not make any fundamental changes at all.
I understand that many of us are saying, “I just want my life back. I just want my freedom back.” Lord knows, as a single extrovert who lives alone, I’d love the chance to date, have sex, go out with friends and physically touch another human being. I get it.
But I also understand this moment in time, with all its attending death, trauma and upheaval, is a chance for individuals to choose something different when the world opens again. It is not a call to simply return to the way things were – it is the opposite. It is a call to choose differently when you have the chance.
But will you choose differently?
I help people connect to their Soul’s Purpose and live a life that embodies their calling. I love what I do and when I see the transformation that is possible, I am honoured to do this work.
But even now, when the Universe has sent us a very clear message that life is short and you need to choose wisely, I can see people are still choosing to stay stuck and will no doubt, make the same choices when lockdown is over.
Many are chafing under the current restrictions yet refusing to use this time to reassess what is really important to them. I see others still hesitating to back themselves and continuing to turn their backs on a life that would provide them with more personal joy and satisfaction. I watch others continue to stay in relationships that are unhealthy and stifling.
This period had been incredibly difficult but if you don’t choose differently when it’s over, then you’re missing the opportunity of a lifetime. You will pass over the chance to step into something greater and far more fulfilling than you’ve had before. Now is not the time to chicken out and continue accepting that you can’t have what you really want. Now is the time to do the work on yourself, face your shadows, call on your personal courage and step forward.
The uncomfortable understandings that are bubbling up within you aren’t supposed to be shoved back into a box when all this is over. Instead they are here to show you where you are out of alignment with your purpose. They are showing you there is another way if only you will choose it.
Now is the time to leave behind those patterns and situations that no longer fit you and choose to reset your life – leave that relationship, do that course, apply for the job you really want, start your business on the side, invest in yourself, change your career, write that book and create the art you love.
Make a clear and definite decision right now to not go back to the old normal. Instead consciously choose to move into alignment with who you truly are and what will make you happy. Make the tough choices, back yourself and if you need support to traverse the road ahead, find someone like me to walk beside you and help you find your way.
Because the very worst thing you could do, is go back to a normal that was never what you wanted anyway.
I’ve met a lot of over-thinking women over the years. They are smart and successful women who appear to have it all together. But when they need to make a personal significant decision they are often stricken with over-thinking, reasoning every little detail half to death before they can decide which way to go. Analysis paralysis often sets in, along with its friends indecision and self-doubt. It’s not a happy party.
Most of these women are also highly-intuitive but, because they have been taught to rely solely on their minds, conflict arises. The powerful mind wants to make the decision (it naively believes it can control outcomes and not change anything) but the powerful intuitive voice must be smothered in the process. The mind does this through spinning into a whirlwind of activity – over-thinking. This is the only way it make enough noise to block out the intuitive voice. Of course, you can still feel the conflict within you (although you may not be conscious of the cause) and this results in side-effects like anxiety and insomnia.
If you make a decision relying solely on your mind (when your intuitive voice has another suggestion), what invariably happens is your decision comes back to bite you a day, year or decade later when you find yourself saying, “I knew I should have done A instead of B” (although you can’t quite explain how you “knew” at all.
The key is to learn how to tune into your intuition effectively and give it an equal seat at the decision making table. This ultimately makes decision making a whole lot easier and far less stressful. If you’re tired of the over-thinking and you’re ready to harness your Intuitive Power, get in touch to book your place in the Nights for Spiritual Beginners. Over six powerful weeks you will learn the skills you need to kick your indecision and doubt to the kerb, and begin connecting to your Soul’s Mission so can get out there and begin creating changing and serving humanity in this lifetime. The first class for January starts soon and places are limited so stop over-thinking, listen to your intuition and get in touch.
Sometimes we procrastinate on things because we really don’t want to do them. But more often than not, I see amazingly talented women procrastinating about the one thing they really want. They will be incredibly focused and dynamic in other areas of their life – family, friends, work, university, etc. But somehow they keep procrastinating on the ONE THING THEY REALLY WANT TO ACHIEVE/DO/BE/CREATE.
A lot of people dismiss procrastination as “laziness” and “lack of focus”. But is there something more formidable lying underneath?
The reason for this is fear. Fear of standing out, fear of failure, fear of what people might think, the “Who do I think I am?” story playing in our heads and the negative self-talk.
Then of course, you don’t do the thing your really want and berate yourself because you didn’t do it! And so the cycle continues and it’s no fun.
The next time you procrastinate about something I recommend you pause for a moment and ask yourself, “What is the real reason I am not moving forward?” Thank your mind for its opinionated and somewhat negative perspectives then put them to one side, and tune into your inner voice instead. Intuitively, you will know the real answer.
Our awareness of the patterns that are holding us back is the first step towards breaking them. If you’re ready to take action and move forward then check out Nights for Spiritual Beginners. You will learn how to tune into your intuition, kick your indecision to the kerb and get yourself on-track so you can Live Your Soul’s Mission, Create Change and Serve Humanity.
Doors are now open for the next program beginning in early January 2019. Spaces are limited so stop procrastinating, take action and get ready to step into a life that lights your up! Email firstname.lastname@example.org for more details.
A few years ago I mentioned to a friend that I was thinking about offering mentoring programs in intuition but I was doubting myself. I wondered, “Am I really the best person to do that?”
My friend (who knew me well) laughed aloud and said, “Lucretia you’ve been mentoring people your whole life, why would you stop now.”
I guess in many ways she was right, it’s just that the topics I teach have changed over time.
For me mentoring is about empowering people to speak what’s in their hearts and follow their path. It’s never really about me, it’s actually about them.
When I’ve stood in front of a class of university students or talked to one them afterwards to help them understand a concept or simply manage the stress of study and trying to have a life at the same time, my goal has always been the same. There are some rules, but more importantly there is the need to trust yourself, know that you’re enough and simply do your best.
In my intuitive mentoring programs, my principles are the same and there is nothing more satisfying than seeing a woman beginning to tune into her inner voice and begin to block out the noise of everyone else’s needs, wants and expectations. It’s at that point, that I know we’re making real progress.
Mentoring and even teaching for me is about helping my students or clients to find their own way forward – I’m just there to provide a few signposts, spotlight the potholes and outline the road rules. The rest is in their hands. It all sounds deceptively simple and, in many ways, it is.
But for someone who has never claimed their intuition as their birthright, it’s not always so easy. I know this because I didn’t even know what it meant to trust myself until I was in my third decade. Until then I did a lot of things I loved, made important life decisions and had very strong opinions. But underneath all that, I didn’t have a clue who I was and I had no one to show me.
Then the Universe threw me a curve ball or two and I began to find out about the parts of me I didn’t even know existed (and if you want to know how that initially worked out you should read my first book The Men I’ve Almost Dated).
Everyone’s journey is different and I don’t claim for one moment to have all the answers. But I do know one thing for absolute certain – trusting your intuition and knowing it will always lead you in the right direction for you is the key to a sense of groundedness and stability in yourself that can’t be bought or lived vicariously through someone else. Without it, your cheeky monkey mind will rationalise you in and out of almost anything and the fulfillment of your purpose on the planet will be a lot more difficult than it needs to be.
Of course, the ultimate key (as I mentioned to a former student tonight) is to trust yourself always and use your mind to execute strategy – then you can’t lose.