‘Love doesn’t make sense and it’s just not practical,’ my friend Linda * told me today. We were discussing men, their behaviour and how we (the women!) react to what they do.
It seems to me there were never truer words spoken.
When you love someone it frequently makes no sense at all. It overtakes you, smites your common sense to the curve and blinds you to things you would usually run from. It sneaks up on you and before you know it, you’re in too deep. And the person you’re in love with may be the complete opposite of what you expected. They may not fit the mold or the picture you had in your head. But you will love them anyway.
It’s also incredibly impractical. Falling in love is the worst for this. You’ll find yourself distracted, staring into space with a smile playing across your face as you think of your love. Focus is a distant memory. You’ll have a million things to do and yet you’ll do none of them.
It’s impractical because it isn’t about order or control or being neat and tidy. It brings chaos because you must let go and fall head first, never knowing where you’ll end up. Love is not well-behaved. It will not do what it’s told. And even if you try to run away from it (yes, some people strangely attempt this) it will still find you in the end. Your love will pop into your head when you least expect it.
That’s just what love does.
Love will make you want to forgive behaviour you would never accept from anyone else (this may not be wise or sensible, but still you’ll want to do it). It can make you turn away from all you’ve known to take a chance on an unknown path.
Love makes you throw caution to the wind.
And if that isn’t unsettling enough, love can decimate you. Its departure can bring you to your knees and take you to edge of madness.
So why do we put ourselves through all of this?
Scientists will tell you falling in love is all about pheromones and genetics. I even read today that you can fall in love by staring into someone’s eyes for a certain period of time and asking the right questions.
But I don’t agree. I prefer to think of love as a more cosmic thing. True love is written in the stars and meant to be…whether you plan it or not.
And I will take its nonsensical, impracticality and possible decimation over the nothingness of its absence any day. Because love cracks you open, allows the light into your soul and, even if it’s only for a short time, it lifts you up higher than you could ever have imagined was possible.
I choose love.