I’ve had a lot of people give me the message that using their intuition costs them too much and they are unwilling to pay the price. While their actual words may have varied over the years, the message has been the same:
- When I use it, I upset people [I would rather they upset me. I don’t want to upset anyone]
- I don’t trust it but I trust my brain so I weigh everything up in my head first before making a decision [even though I’m experiencing anxiety every day, constantly feel like I’m in the wrong place and it eventually blows up in my face when I don’t trust it]
- I think it might be my fear talking [so I ignore it)
- It’s telling me I have to do something else but I don’t know how to so… [I’m going to keep doing what I’ve always done]
- I “know” I need to leave/change but before I do that I think I have to do X first [finds reasons to not to listen to themselves]
- I want X but maybe some people never get what they want because… [if I did what I want I would have to change my life/upset someone/stop doing destructive behaviours]
- I’ve had this idea to do something but I don’t think I’m good enough so… [I’m going back to doing what I’ve always done and not chase my dream]
- I feel like something isn’t right with him but everyone else thinks he’s great so… [gets screwed over by a colleague at work]
- I “know” he’s not right for me but I’m going to make it work because security/don’t want to be alone/kids [ends up in unhappy and destructive relationship]
- My parents/colleagues/friends think that’s all just “woo woo” [and I don’t want to stand out because I don’t want to be rejected…but I’m probably never going to be happy either]
- I feel like doing this thing is right for me but X thinks something else and they are a lot more sensible than me so… [continues to believe that their own knowing can’t be trusted and isn’t as valuable as someone else’s opinion”.
Have you found yourself thinking or saying these words over the years? You are not alone because a lot of people do the same. But, just like you, they’re not 100 percent happy with where they’re at in life because they’re not trusting themselves and listening to their intuition. Because the true “cost” of listening to your intuition is letting go of what your mind and sometimes other people think should happen and instead trusting that your life is going to be far more expansive and yes, unpredictable that you could ever imagine.
Yes, you will probably have to change things and make decisions that may upset the status quo occasionally. Yes, you will have to learn how to trust yourself implicitly and be prepared to take risks. And yes, you will have to sacrifice the uncomfortably comfortable life you may have built for yourself where your mind feels like it can relax because it has a pretty good idea about what comes next (even if your heart feels unfulfilled/miserable).
So yes, there will be a price to pay if you start tuning in, listening to and then taking action when your intuition calls you forward.
But I believe the price will be much higher if you don’t use it. Don’t you?
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I’ve been coming up against fear lately. I’m not talking about feeling a little anxious or concerned. I’m actually talking about pure terror and it’s not for a reason that may make sense to you.
You see, I’m not usually a fearful person. Many people who know me well would probably tell you I’m one of the least fearful people they’ve ever met. I’m the one out there on the edge, taking risks. But I’m not talking about physical risks like base jumping. I’m talking about emotional and personal risks that put myself out there; pushing my personal boundaries and jumping in where angels fear to tiptoe, that sort of thing. You see, being completely and wholly myself is incredibly important to me but the downside (for want of a better word) is that I am often left exposed emotionally and quite vulnerable. I feel compelled to ‘go there’, move forward and expand who I am but in order to do so, I often have to prise my own fingertips from the window ledge and allow myself to freefall, not knowing where I will land.
Recently the Universe has been pushing me to go to the edges of my comfort zone again and it’s been bringing up fear, big time. From being asked to perform in my Latin dance class in front of other dancers (and in the future, public audiences), to really going for it in my business and some other challenges, I’ve been feeling incredibly exposed.
How can dancing in front of my class make me feel terrified when I can confidently get up in front of a more than 100 people and present (and enjoy it!)? I know it doesn’t make sense. But it’s true. As I said to one of my classmates, “I’m not talking about something rational.” Fear is never rational.
When I shared my fears with my sister she suggested I need to do the things I’m terrified of and there’s a reason the Universe is sending these things my way.
The irony of her comments did not escape me as it’s the kind of advice I usually give to other people.
One of the most interesting things about my fear is observing how I respond when it comes up. In short, every part of me goes into resistance and a range of emotions riot at the surface. The anger, resentment and sometimes tearfulness I feel at being pushed to do something every part of me is resisting is extreme. I want to run from the room immediately, yell or nail my feet to the floor so they can’t move me.
It’s such an over-the-top reaction that it would be amusing, if I wasn’t experiencing it. I also know that such a radical response definitely warrants further investigation because it is blocking my progress forward in some way. In my experience, this type of response usually covers something that needs to come to the surface and be released.
Everyone has fears and you don’t have to do the thing you’re scared of. I’m certainly not going to commit to dancing in front of others just yet. But I am committed to closely looking at the fear it brings up and then taking steps to resolve it.
Perhaps you may see me in a public dance performance yet.
Lucretia is an author, psychic channel and transformational teacher who helps women move past their fears and connect to their inner truth. Her personalised intuitive mentoring programs help women reclaim their Intuitive Power and Live Their Soul’s Mission. Contact Lucretia at firstname.lastname@example.org for more information. You can also find more of her work on Facebook and Instagram
Can you remember a time when you gave up on something you loved or dreamed about? It might have been when you were a kid, or a teenager or as an adult. I want you to think about when you chose to stop going for that dream or doing that job or activity that you loved. Regardless of the circumstances, there was a moment when you chose to let it go.
Maybe some other kids made fun of you for being different, so you gave it up. Maybe a teacher said you weren’t good enough, so you gave it up. Maybe someone told you that it would be too hard or maybe impossible, so you gave it up. Maybe you had a family to provide for, so you gave it up.
Can you see that moment in your mind’s eye? Can you remember how it felt?
When I look back, I can see a few of those moments too. The one that stands out tonight as I write this post, is the moment I realised that if I was going to be with my husband then I would probably never work overseas. He was perfectly happy staying where he was and we were married and I loved him. At the time, my choice seemed obligatory and not a real choice at all. If I wanted my relationship then I had to give up the exciting dream that beckoned to me.
But it was me who chose. I could have gone for six months and then returned, but I didn’t (I wasn’t brave enough to take that risk on my own). I could have left him, but I didn’t (that came years later when our paths were definitely and permanently no longer running in parallel).
I chose not to chase that dream.
Over the past 13 years, since my marriage ended, I have done a lot of travel. I guess you could say I’ve been making up for lost time. I even worked remotely for clients while I was in Italy last year, so I guess you could say I finally realised my dream after all. Does that mean we all eventually get where we’re meant to go? I’m not sure.
I know I’ve come a long way from that 20-something young woman who was too scared to go for what she really wanted. I also know that the love I’m seeking these days won’t require me to give up what I love and dream of. Compromise in a relationship is one thing, but giving up on your dreams and the things you love permanently is a choice I’m no longer willing to make.
Life will always throw us curve balls. Sometimes we have to defer things and put them off for a while until it’s a better time. I know this. But the danger is when we choose to make those decisions to align with other people’s expectations, or when we think we should just be more sensible, more practical and [insert all the other reasons we tell ourselves why we can’t have what we truly desire and deserve].
I hope that when you read this post you will remember that thing you loved or dreamt of. I also hope you will choose to find a way to reach for it again because the real cost of giving up what you love is always too high.
Lucretia is an author, psychic channel and transformational teacher who helps women reach for what they love. Her three-month, personalised mentoring programs help women like you claim their Intuitive Power and Live Their Soul’s Mission. Contact Lucretia at email@example.com for more information. You can also find more of her work on Facebook and Instagram