Well, it wasn’t actually my ex Gerry. But for a moment my heart stopped because this guy looked just like him.
After my brain registered that it wasn’t him and my heart started beating again, I found myself thinking about Gerry and the connection we had.
It was one of those highly sexual connections where quite frankly, we could have ripped each other’s clothes off at any moment. But sadly, possibly because he forgot to mention he had a girlfriend, our relationship didn’t quite work out the way I hoped.
In hindsight, this was probably a good thing.
I’ve been single for a while now and the Gerry story is not the only negative male-related scenario I’ve come across. In fact, my whole book (The Men I’ve Almost Dated – currently being edited) covers the bizarre and often dysfunctional behaviour I’ve witnessed on the dating scene.
Unfortunately, these experiences have had a rather nasty side effect for me. I now find myself being just a little too cautious and often a little too defensive around men. In fact, sometimes I’m so busy playing defense that I forget to open the door and let the good ones in.
I was out last night and I did exactly that with a man who definitely has possibilities. I shut him down. I was just a little too much of a smart-mouth. It was reflex thing and I’m not exactly proud of it. But hey, like most people, I am a product of my experience so I’m not going to beat myself up about it too much.
Instead I’ve decided to change course and try a different tack.
So tonight I’ve made contact and opened the door just a little so he can walk through it.
Who knows, he could turn out to be rather fabulous. I’ll just have to trust that he’s not another Gerry and wait and see what happens next.
Wish me luck.