Should you be more realistic about your future?

Should you be more realistic about your future?

If you’ve found this post then you’re someone who wants to create change in the world. You want to live differently to the way your parents and other people you know have lived. You have a vision or maybe just an inkling of doing things differently.

Have you ever shared your desire, your dream, your vision with someone you thought would have your back? Maybe you opened up just a little and trusted them.

You wanted their support and understanding but instead, all you heard was something like:

  • “Oh look that sounds a bit like a dream to me and not very realistic”
  • “I really think you need to be a bit more practical”
  • “I think that’s something you can do on the side. But for now you should finish your degree and get a really good job”
  • “We never had these opportunities when we were young and we wanted to make sure that you have them. So don’t waste them. Get a good job and get paid well. Forget all that other stuff because it’s not very realistic. Just go out and achieve, achieve, achieve.” (This may come from your parents if they didn’t have a lot of opportunities.)

When you get this type of negative or “realistic” feedback about what you want to create, it can be really hard to keep your focus and maintain your faith in your ability to make your dreams real.

But there are things you can do to make sure their stories and negative feedback doesn’t take you off track and stop you from living your purpose.  

Understand their response is about THEIR STORY NOT YOURS.

We all tell ourselves stories about what is possible and what is not. These are based on our experiences, beliefs and interactions with others.

But if you share your desire or dream with someone and their story negatively influences their response, you potentially enter a danger zone. If you are not feeling really grounded and centred in yourself, you will take their story on as your truth. This is dangerous for you because it’s not the truth. It is just a story they believe and they are projecting it onto you.

It’s possible their dreams were squashed when they were young and they lost hope that they could do anything different. This led them to conform and do what their parents, community and friends wanted them to do. So your idea to do something that bucks the system will confront their beliefs and the story they’ve been telling themselves about what their life can, could or should be.

I’m not trying to invalidate their perspectives because those experiences will be real for them. But that’s their story, NOT YOURS. You’re here to create your own story.

Yes, you need to be able to support yourself financially, look after and be responsible for yourself. But that doesn’t mean you have to live the same kind of life that other people think you should live.

ALL OR NOTHING THINKING can stop you before you start

Sometimes we also have all or nothing thinking and this stops us from moving forward. You will be worrying that if you make the wrong decision now, you might screw everything up. This leaves you feeling indecisive and sometimes you avoid making any decisions at all.

But whatever you’re doing when you’re aged 20, 22, 25, 27, etcetera, YOU WON’T BE DOING THOSE THINGS IN ANOTHER 10 YEARS. Nothing stays the same for that long so you’re better off taking a chance in this moment, doing what feels right for you and moving forward. Otherwise you will be waiting for the perfect time and a guaranteed outcome (neither of these exist!!).

One particular decision is rarely going to make or break your entire life. Waiting for other people to “get it”, and understand and support your decisions is also wasting time.

If other people don’t agree with your life choices, that is not your problem.

Yes, we all want people to like us. But you cannot put yourself into a box to help other people feel more comfortable with their life choices. That’s not your job.

What other people think of you is none of your business. You need to focus on what you think of you!

Focus on what you feel is the next right step for you and trust yourself. When you do that, you are moving forward with your life purpose and life path. You will meet other people along the way who will get what you are trying to do. They will understand what you’re trying to create and will support you. But there will be others who will test your faith in yourself.

You need to make the best decision for you right now and understand that not everyone is going to agree with you, and that’s okay. Sure, sit back and question yourself a little but then ask yourself “Okay, what feels like the right thing for me?” then follow that and know it’s all going to work out. It probably won’t look like you think it will – life never works out the way we think it should. But it’s going to work out beautifully and in the best possible way for you.

If you’re ready to follow your dreams and create the life your Soul is calling out for, check out the Dream Creators Collective – an intensive six-week transformational process for intuitives, empaths and energetically-sensitive people who are ready to create change and serve humanity.

 If you are sick of feeling like you’re not enough…if you’re tired of the BS…if you’re done with that annoying voice in your head that keeps making excuses and says you can’t or you shouldn’t, then the Dream Creators Collective is for you. 

It’s for people who are ready to get serious, develop epic self-trust and harness their intuition so they can get out there and create change in the world.

The Dream Creators Collective is about learning practical skills to help you manage overwhelm and move you forward, managing and using your intuitive gifts, exploring your passions, living your purpose and connecting with yourself and others.

The six-week transformational process starts in early December 2019. Limited spaces.

Go to the edge of your comfort zone, cross the border, then keep going

Go to the edge of your comfort zone, cross the border, then keep going

Are you doing a university degree that you don’t really like or staying in a job that you don’t really care about? Maybe you want to travel but you’re too afraid to go alone.

Well, this week I heard from a former work colleague who was a lot like you are now. But guess what?! He’s just decided to blow his comfort zone out of the water.

Like a lot of 20-somethings, he has a huge amount of potential but he was stuck in his comfort zone and kept waiting for someone else to join him so he could begin his adventures. Until now.

A few days ago, he sent me a PM which said:


“…You implored me to stop trying to wait for other people and just get out there regardless if they come with you or not. Well, I decided to up and go on a holiday by myself to Bali, because no one else could get time off and I wanted to go…”

Receiving this kind of message makes my day, month and year because he has chosen to bust through his comfort zone and do what he really wants without waiting for someone else. And his life and perspectives will expand exponentially because he has chosen to move past his comfort zone into the unknown.

I meet so many people who are waiting for approval or someone to join them before they make the change they want in their life. But the honest truth is, that may never happen. And that will be a wasted life because one day you will be 95 years old, sitting in a rocking chair with false teeth and barely any hair, and you will be thinking, F@CK why didn’t I go for what I wanted instead of what was comfortable? Now it’s too late.

Stop waiting.

Photo by Road Trip with Raj on Unsplash

If You Hide Your Light, No One Can See It

If You Hide Your Light, No One Can See It

A few days ago, a fabulous 20-something friend sent me a PM with exciting news – an international organisation had seen her commentary online about an issue she is passionate about and were interested in partnering with her. They even wanted her to write a blog for them.

My amazing friend was OVER THE MOON.

This inspirational woman is not just a great friend. She has also been a client over the past few years and we have talked many times about putting herself out there. I’ve always known she is here to create some wonderful changes in the world but she has often hesitated to share her voice and opinions.

Until now.

LOTS OF 20-SOMETHINGS HIDE THEIR LIGHT because…

  • You think other people can say it better
  • You’re worried about offending people (i.e. you want everyone to like you)
  • Your parents/friends/family/strangers on the street won’t agree with you, “get it” or will think you’re crazy
  • You think you’re not good enough
  • You think no one really cares what you think
  • Et cetera, et cetera.

Does this sound like you? If so, trust me, you are not alone AT ALL. But I have to tell you something…it’s all BS!! All those stories you’ve been telling yourself about why you can’t do what you want, say what you want, be who you want and go where you want to go are NOT TRUE.

You are capable of creating a world that is more kind, more sustainable, more creative, more loving, more expansive, more everything that you believe is important BUT you will have to show your light first. You will have to put yourself out there, back yourself, take risks, be by yourself for a while, take the road less travelled, be the one dissenting voice in the crowd, be okay with people thinking you’re crazy, be okay with offending people.

If you want a different life, you must change you first. You must take your passions and channel them into things that you love, and then share them with the world so others can hear your voice. Just like my friend, you will have to feel a little bit nervous, terrified and excited all at the same time. And then you will need to begin.

Because if you hide your light, no one can see it. And the world needs to see it. Trust me.

What if we’re asking the wrong question?

What if we’re asking the wrong question?

I took my book and made my way into the backyard this afternoon. The sun in Brisvegas is unseasonably warm and being a girl who loves the heat, I was keen to make the most of it.

My backyard includes a pool, thick green grass and a view of the river. But it hasn’t always been this way.

A few weeks ago, I left my home of 13 years to move here. It was a big choice to sell my house and I’m still feeling the reverberations of that choice, even now. My life is different now. The way I live is different now. And the space I inhabit within the world has changed.

It always intrigues me how when we change one thing in our lives, things change around us too. When we shift so does our energy and those ripples inexorably spread out into the world affecting our relationship with others and indeed, our relationship with ourselves.

Change one thing and many things change. Change a lot of things and you can imagine the impact is little more significant.

For me, my recent big change has led me to see much of my life through a different lens. I feel freer because in many ways I am starting anew. How I interact with strangers has shifted too. I am more open and I find myself feeling even more curious about the human condition. I observe more, feel more. Certainly my psychic channel feels much stronger, more attuned and more powerful than it has been.

My house was a home and a refuge. But eventually it became a place where I felt stuck and hidden from the world. Perhaps it was also a symbol of a life I thought I would once have that never eventuated.

So now I’m here.

As I sat beside the pool, relaxing in the sun, I found myself asking that question we frequently ask when seeking clarity about our next steps and where we want to go:

“If you could do anything, what would you do?”

As I rolled the question around in my head, I realised something that had never really cut-through my psyche before. I had asked the wrong question. The real question is:

“You can do anything so what are you going to do first and when are you going to do it?”

The second question is the true question and I laughed at myself when I realised it.

So many of the reasons we give ourselves for not doing what we truly want are mere excuses. They may be very reasonable and logical excuses but they are excuses just the same.

And when we start the discussion from a place of restriction with a focus on perceived obstacles, we cut ourselves off at the knees even before we start the race.

I was sitting there in that beautiful setting because I made some difficult but necessary decisions to change my life. To be honest, the Universe in many ways brought me to metaphorical knees before I would make those decisions, but I still made them. And I don’t regret them for one minute. Because once you let go of what you ‘think’ your life should look like as you move towards your goals, you allow whole new perspectives to show up that will take you to places you never expected to go (and sometimes resist visiting) and soon after you will realise you are exactly where you need to be.

I never thought I would end up living somewhere like this, but it’s perfect. So as I settle in, I now know what question I should really be asking.

Are you ready to ask it too?

You can create change when you share your story

You can create change when you share your story

I met a young guy today – let’s call him Mickey* – who is going for what he believes in. He is establishing a business and believes he can make a difference to people’s lives through what he does. I believe he can make a difference too.

What was interesting is, as I thought about my appointment with him (which was for a personal issue of my own), I found myself picking up information about how he could promote and market his business more effectively. This is one of the ways my psychic channel often works – I seem to be good at picking up how people are blocking themselves from achieving their next level, and then I tune into the way forward and up. Sometimes this happens without any intention from me – being psychic means I’m a bit like a giant antennae and will sometimes just pick up stuff because that’s how I roll.

Although we have a mutual friend, I had never met Mickey before today. But I could feel his energy and passion for what he is creating long before I walked into his office. So when we met in person, I shared the insights I had felt with him.

As so often happens in these situations, he had been thinking about some of the things I mentioned but had been stopping himself from following through. He also shared that others had made some suggestions but yet, still, he had not moved forward.

This made me laugh because it is exactly how the Universe works when we are preventing ourselves from shifting.

The Universe will send us the same message over and over again, via conversations, books, movies, signs, random thoughts and other ways to try and get our attention. We humans are often slow learners and don’t like the unknown so I guess the Universe knows it has to ‘stay on message’ to get through our resistance.

Mickey and I talked a little about what was getting in the way and I gave him a few new marketing ideas to think about. I hope he actions them because he has a lot to give but people won’t hear about it unless he pushes that edge of his comfort zone just a little bit more.

When I was about to leave Mickey mentioned a topic he is passionate about. He has a slightly controversial perspective and when I noted this he said, he believed it and wanted to talk about it.

I said, “Go for it”.

I believe you should take your conviction and passion, stand on it and use it to lift you up so you can share your story with the world and create the change you want to see.

I look forward to seeing how Mickey’s business grows in the future. His willingness to back himself and speak his truth will help him to forge ahead and create the difference he wants to see in the world.

I hope if you’re reading this, you take a chance on sharing your story too.

Moving, memories and bringing order to chaos

Moving, memories and bringing order to chaos

My house looks like a rubbish tip and not a well-organised one. I’m moving and my previously ordered (mostly) belongings are now strewn haphazardly around the place as if thieves ransacked my home last night. But there have been no thieving visitors, only me and my random packing methods over the past few weeks.

It’s a strange feeling to be putting all my stuff into boxes. When you live in one place for 13 years, you accumulate a lot of memories and items to go with them. I’ve rediscovered artwork from my childhood and travel documents from my first solo overseas trip. I also found three small figurines tucked into the back of a sideboard. I can remember proudly buying them at Paddy’s Market with my very own pocket money when I was about 12 years old. As I held them in my hands I was transported back to a time when my life felt softer and gentler somehow.

As things are moved, packed or given away, my emotions tumble this way and that – just like I hope the boxes won’t do in the removalist’s storage container on Thursday.

Anxiety, optimism and fearfulness have paid a few visits. Tears have been shed as I’ve recalled a fond or painful memory. I’ve pictured my two cats SuperPuss and Mirabel, now passed, wandering then hallway and keeping me company, showing me love and lifting my spirits. I’ve seen again in my mind’s eye, my body on the floor sobbing with heartbreak over more than one man who did not deserve the love I offered.

I wrote and published my first anonymous blog post in this house – terrified that someone would know it was me. I also wrote and published my first book here too and began my first business enterprise.  

When I move into my new home, it will hold no memories for me. Instead it will be a clean slate; a new place to create a different life.

The thought of that newness and letting go of the known of this place is scary and enticing in turns. But before I reach that place, I must first navigate and bring order to the chaos I’m currently surrounded by.

And get my hands on some more boxes!